Category Archives: Bucket List

Celebrating seven decades…

Celebrating seven decades…

My husband is continually planning trips to coincide with my chemo treatment schedule. The trips usually celebrate life. This trip deserved a little more focus, after all we were celebrating reaching another decade. I miraculously had reached my 70th birthday.

Miraculous because just 5 years ago I was given a diagnosis with a statistically low survival rate of 9% for 5 years. At that time I seriously doubted I would even see my 70th birthday, let alone be taking a trip to honor it.

Tommy had encouraged friends to come along if they could, on our five day vacation to Napa. He had organized an amazing itinerary. Each day would begin with a spa service for both of us, a limo driver would pick us up before lunchtime and and we would delight in private wine tastings at just two of the finest vineyards Napa has to offer. We would be driven to a perfectly selected dinner spot then taken back to our hotel to sit by the outdoor fireplace and reflect on the day. Perfectly planned by this seasoned Napa admirer.

Our dear friends Pete and Pam

Only one couple could get away for the adventure, Pete and Pam. They had never been to Napa but accompany us on most of our adventures. We are great traveling buddies.

The trip was just fantastic and we found ourselves relaxed and refreshed after leaving. We couldn’t wait to share with our friends back home the delicious and very special wines we had purchased on our trip. Now on to the second leg of this birthday celebration… Las Vegas!

It was certainly a birthday celebration to remember.

Thank you my sweet Joseph!

Pompeii and Vesuvius

Pompeii and Vesuvius

To the east, just around the bay of Naples, a 25 minute drive, you will find Pompeii and Herculaneum. These two cities are the most completely preserved cities of classical antiquity along with their nemesis, the volcano Vesuvius. The volcanic ash and lava from the eruption on the morning of August 23rd, AD 79 of Il Vesuvio preserved these towns almost exactly as they were on that day. This left them not just archeological ruins but precise replicas of daily life in this ancient world. Our family enjoyed a two hour tour by an informative guide who unveiled the mysteries of this ancient ruin.

This once bustling commercial center with a population of 10,000 to 20,000 covers 160 acres. Approximately one third of the ruins have been unearthed. Our family walked along the tracks of chariot wheels cut in the pavement. The rings where the horses were tied still remain near the sisterns which allowed them to drink the fresh mountain water while their charioteers enjoyed a beer. Pompeii’s frescoes which are painted in vibrant reds and orange have remarkably retained their vibrancy. You could feel the presence of the people as we wandered past what once obviously was their home.

Our entire family stood in awe of the plaster casts of those overwhelmed by the eruption left in situ. The Orto dei Fuggiaschi (Garden of the Fugitives).

The temperature was around 86 degrees but the gentle breeze made the two hour walking tour seem short. Even the children enjoyed this part of our Italian adventure.

Embracing our roots

Embracing our roots

Riarda, Caserta, Campagnia, IT

The entire family, three grand babies under 4, four grand children, twins 17, two more age 19 and 22, daughter and her husband, two sons and their wives plus Tommy and I made for 15 traveling from Jacksonville, Florida to Naples Italy 5,176 miles as the crow flies in 14.5 hours.

Our plans to celebrate Tom’s 60th journey around the earth brought us to Naples where we would stay for two days exploring Riardo, Caserta and our family roots and a guided tour of Pompeii. Next, a week at Villa Antonella, our lux vacation home in Sorrento and the Amalfi Coast. Day trips were planned to the Isle of Capri, Positano and a full day on a 50 foot yacht cruising the Isle of Capri with hope of a dip in the Blue Grotto. A trip most could only dream of.

We feel so extremely blessed. I believe there is a purpose behind this trip that will one day be revealed. But, for now, we must breathe it all in, every moment, every unexpected scent of truffle, every landscape of God’s creation. And, we will do it together, making memories that will last a lifetime of laughter, meals, family games, trips, sunsets, mountains, moments.

Just two weeks prior to our trip we were given the pathology results from my lung resection to remove three tumors that the doctors believed were lung cancer. They shockingly reported the cells were consistent with pancreas cancer. The news hit us hard in the gut. The pancreas cancer had metastasized to my lungs. Now the trip took on even more meaning.

Our hotel was situated in the center of Naples overlooking the port. When we explained to our driver what we were doing, he was sure to point out a beautiful but vacant building at the edge of the port where Luigi Zitiello passed thru in 1906 before boarding the ship that would carry them to their destination, in his case Ellis Island. We shared our research and the addresses we wished to locate once we arrived in Riardo. He seemed to share in our excitement and was eager to help us.

We spent some time sitting in the piazza and just walking the cobblestone steps where Tom’s ancestors had walked before us. My heart was filled as I watched our children and grandchildren stare at the beauty of this ancient city, near Caserta, the home of the Royal Palace.

Those many conversations with Tommy’s Dad about his family at my breakfast table while I reviewed Ancestry hints for accuracy had paid off. We had found our way to the root of our children’s family tree. It was a day I will never forget.

On the steps in Riardo

The second happiest day of my life…..

The second happiest day of my life…..

November 27th, 2014 Our Catholic Wedding Ceremony

November 27th, 2014 Our Catholic Wedding Ceremony

On Friday, the 4th of August, 1983 I married the love of my life in Clearwater, Florida. Rev. Comer of the Clearwater First Methodist Church presided over the ceremony. My dear friend and co-worker Susan Miles attended this church and suggested it for our ceremony since we were not able to be married in the Catholic church because I had been divorced.

For 31 years I attended mass and took communion against Catholic doctrine. My children were all raised Catholic and received all sacraments on time. I love the tradition of the Roman Catholic religion and felt as Catholic as the person sitting next to me until it was time for communion. When I would approach the priest, I would hold my hands out to receive the host and say “amen” just like everyone before and after me….but I felt the priest had to know that I was living a lie. I was NOT the dutiful Catholic I pretended to be. I felt guilty and ashamed and alienated.

In October, 2013 I attended a retreat at our parish called Christ Renews His Parish or CRHP pronounced “chirp” by past attendees. The weekend was life changing for me. The most important revelation was that I had been Catholic since my Grandmother had baptized me when I was 6 weeks old.

After the weekend, with the help of Deacon Dan Scrone, I navigated the required paperwork and became a legal Roman Catholic. All my sacraments were validated and I was a true Roman Catholic.

My dream was to be married in the Catholic Church so that when I received holy communion, I could do so with the same pride and intent as every other Catholic.

God was certainly busy putting all the desires of my heart into action before I was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer in April, 2015. I thank Him every day for placing my church family deeply into my heart. Their prayers and support during the difficult time ahead after that CRHP weekend would be invaluable.

Thank you my sweet Jesus!

It's official.....

It’s official…..

Our happy family

Our happy family

Baby “G”

Baby “G”

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In just three weeks, give or take a few, according to God’s will, you will greet the world with a huge cry and your Mommy and Daddy will witness a true miracle. You come as a blessing and a testament to their love for one another.

You must be able to feel the love they have, and all of your family have, as we anticipate your arrival into the world. Mommy, Mimi and I have been preparing your places in each of our homes so that when you arrive you will be safe and comfy and yes, a little spoiled.

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You have so many family members who can’t wait to hold you and see you. Great Grandpa Lugi, Aunt Cathy, Aunt Mary and Aunt Missy, Cousins Jack and Matt are planning trips from Cleveland just to meet you. Others, like your cousins who live close by,too many to list, are excited to meet you and can’t wait to be able to play with you and babysit you when Mommy and Daddy need to get a night out.

I just want you to know how much you are loved. I dream about you every night. You are a special ray of sunshine in my days, and you haven’t even been born yet.

I am praying that your arrival is smooth and without too much trouble.

God is gracing us again with an angel right here on earth.

Thank you Lord!
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A field of sunflowers

A field of sunflowers

Who doesn’t smile when they see the face of a bright yellow sunflower?
I told my friends on the trip to Tuscany the only picture I really wanted was one standing in a field of sunflowers, and they came thru for me.

One day we agreed to venture down the dangerous white road (dry gravel road with a 30 degree grade) to visit some of the nearby towns. Along the way we spotted fields of tall sunflowers stretching their large faces toward the sun.

When we found a perfect field we turned off the highway onto a ribboned path between two flowered fields. A farmhouse sat nested in the flowers to our left. We were definitely trespassing. And I believe we could not have been the first carload of American women to do the exact thing.

No place to turn around so the girls directed me back out.


Tower of the Truffles – Torre del Tartufo

Tower of the Truffles – Torre del Tartufo

Torre del Tartufo - Arezzo, Italy

As we walked the grounds just minutes after we arrived my friend Lisa quietly admitted she was thinking on the plane…”it is such a long trip, what if I really don’t like this place? Judi, this is truly the most beautiful and peaceful place I have ever seen. I am coming back for my 60th.” Within five minutes she was already planning to return.

That is the feeling that I felt my first trip with Kelly in 2010 to Tuscookany’s Casa Ombuto which is located just a thirty minute drive from Torre. Both locations are wonderful with spectacular views and restored villas that make you feel as if you are living a true Tuscan lifestyle.

Tuscookany staffs each villa with about six people. The manager, Barbara is the perfect hostess and sees to your every need. She dines with you several times and makes herself available to arrange a trip or answer travel questions. There are two housekeepers whom you seldom see. They tidy your room daily and do your laundry if requested. There is a groundskeeper you might see pruning the bushes or stoking the wood fired hot tub. Of course there is your Chef and their assistant. That is it. And, after dinner, everyone leaves the villa. The only sound you might hear is that of a wild boar.

This trip we took the Seven Day Italian Course. While this sounds like an intense amount of cooking we actually were only in the kitchen about four hours a day for four days. The rest of the time we spent relaxing by the pool, having massages or site seeing in the towns nearby.

Barbara greeted me with hugs and tears. She was pleased to see me return and made certain I was well taken care of. She placed me in what is known as the “honeymoon suite”. It is a very large room with a fireplace and an iron canopied king bed. All of the bathrooms are marbled floor to ceiling with large wooden beams that remind you of the rustic barn like feeling of a true Tuscan building.
The floors are stone and several large windows that are kept open allow the mountain breezes to waif through your room day and night. No air conditioning is needed in the warmest of temperatures.
This is truly a slice of heaven on earth.

Poolside at Torre. The honeymoon suite has the four windows with white curtains.

I do……

I do……

Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Christopher Garrity


Eight months have passed since that autumn day in October when our beautiful daughter, Lindsay became Mrs. Matthew C. Garrity. Much like the last eight months, the wedding we had been planning sped by quickly. Even now I reflect on it and an image pops into my head of a small detail. I wonder if I will forget those special touches that marked the occasion unique and so very “Lindsay”. Yet we all have those moments etched in our minds. Points in time when life took on a greater level of meaning and happiness. October 2nd, 2010 was one of those days.

Matt and his father, Jack Garrity.

Tom had entertained the groomsmen at our home where they relaxed around the pool, played cards in the man room and donned their classic black tuxes for the wedding. It was befitting for the groom and his groomsmen to spend the morning in that room. Tom was in his glory.

The groomsmen celebrate!

Lindsay had asked me to spend the entire day at her side. Gladly accommodating, I was with my daughter-bride and her maids at theTPC Clubhouse that can be viewed from our back door. We had taken over the ladies locker room.The TPC staff lavished us with endless champagne and trays of light hors d’oeuvres and fruit and cheese as friends and relatives dropped in to make a delivery or offer help in some way. Margot, our friend and wedding photographer was busy snapping away while Andrea, the make-up artist and Grayzna, our hair stylist prepared the beautiful maids. All the while, Lindsay’s lace dress hung from the chandelier, awaiting the moment when she would don the one element that would set her apart from every other person at the wedding. That dress that had been kept secret from all but the bridesmaids and their Mothers for several months.

A tender moment captured

At one point there was a knock at the door. Audrey answered and In strolled Blake, Matt’s cousin and one of his Best Men holding a wrapped box and a letter. He handed Lindsay the gift and waited for her to open it, a camera for the honeymoon. Audrey read the letter from Matt aloud as we all melted! His words were touching and sweet and full of love. Blake gave Lindsay a hug and told her he would see her at the church and returned to groomsmen. Then Audrey left to deliver Matt’s special gift, a beautiful watch to remind him of the day and a letter full of love and promises.

The morning sun was peeking through puffy white clouds that turned a dark grey by noon. There had been big plans for The Lawn behind the TPC Clubhouse after the church ceremony and prior to the reception in the Ponte Vedra Grand Ballroom on the second floor of the Clubhouse a Spanish revival architecture building that although was built in 2009, appears to be hundreds of years old. There had been no rain for several weeks and there was no more than a twenty percent chance. But, around 12:30 the skies opened up and it poured for half an hour, just long enough to turn the lawn to a soggy green sponge. Certainly no place for a soft white bridal gown and maids in trailing yellow-gold bobbinette, not to mention the guests in those stylish stilettos. The wedding coordinator made the decision and informed the Father of the Bride there would be no hot air balloon champagne toasts or outdoor bar.The guitar player would join the harp player in the grand foyer and the bars and high boys set up on the gallery overlooking the foyer. It is written that a bit of rain on your wedding day will bring your marriage good luck.

Our floral designer, Liza Chung is an accomplished stylist and had outdone herself with Lindsay’s wedding design. The bridal bouquet and bridal party bouquets arrived in two huge baskets. Lindsay’s bouquet burst with blush peonies, creamy white roses, cala lillies and gentle cymbidium orchids. The blunt cut stems were tightly wound with cream colored ribbon held with pearl headed pins. The maids bouquets were a smaller version of Lindsay’s. Liza is truly an artist.

A white stretch limo would pick up the bride, myself and the maids after delivering the Groom, his future Father in Law and his groomsmen, that included Matt’s Father as best man to the church a short five minute drive away. As we waited for the limo to arrive Margot captured amazing images of Lindsay and the Bridesmaids and me around the picturesque clubhouse. The rain had freshened the air and we felt like we were floating on a cloud in anticipation. Visitors to the clubhouse stopped and smiled when they saw us. Who doesn’t like a wedding?

The Bride and her maids.

Liza and her “divas” motioned for us to come up the grand staircase and take a peek at the site of the reception. When we opened the door I could smell the flowers. The huge rustic iron chandeliers were draped with ropes of small pearls. The tables varied in design so as not to overstate. Some tables boasted four foot tall glass vessels filled with pearls and bursting over with huge sprays of blush peonies, roses and cymbidium orchids with the soft golden glow of waves of votives beneath. Other tables held glass blocks filled with glass gems and holding trails of cymbidium orchids and more votives. Some tables were centered with a collection of clear wine bottles topped with flickering tapers and more blush peonies, cream roses in bowls. In the middle of each table was a small wooden toy bi-plane with a gold number painted on it’s wings. The theme was flight and adventure in keeping with Matt’s proposal and the stunt plane. At the end of the dance floor was a smaller sweetheart table with crystal bowls brimming with peonies, roses, and orchids. The soft glow from the candles that covered the table was angelic. Two place settings set side by side where the bride and groom would eat their first meal together as husband and wife. When the doors were flung open welcoming everyone to the reception it would be magical.

The sweetheart table

Finally, our carriage arrived and the girls carefully stepped into the limo with their bouquets. Lindsay and I were the last to enter. Matt’s desire was coming to meet him at the beautiful church where they would speak their vows and begin the adventure of their lives as one. She was on her way to say….”I do”.

Seven Mile Drive Canopy

Seven Mile Drive Canopy


In May, 1993 Tom and I borrowed from every source we could to purchase the lot and contract a custom home builder to construct our “dream house”. When we moved on the street not one tree was planted along the Seven Mile Drive hill. But, the hair stood up on my arms every time I drove up that hill and looked out over the beautiful golf course and winding creeks that make up The TPC at Sawgrass and I admit all these years have passed and I still feel that way.

The street looks a lot different today. The empty lots have been filled with gorgeous homes and children have grown and families continue to grow larger. It is a wonderful place to live.

Recently, when the trees had bloomed and the canopy was again complete I took this picture of the hill. I hope you enjoy it too.

Yoda, the stunt airplane/the proposal

Yoda, the stunt airplane/the proposal

An entry from my personal journal November 28, 2009

Grandma and Grandpa Zitiello traveled from Cleveland to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday with their Florida family. Normally they would stay in Cleveland to be near Cathy and her children, Mary and Missy, Tom’s three sisters. But, we had convinced them to make the trip south this year.

Tom and I had a secret to keep. Certainly it was difficult, but, we realized the importance of containing our excitement and remained tight lipped.

Each day we awoke to the question; could this be the day?  Lindsay had no idea of  the life changing event that was about to happen. She continued her routine, work, eat, meet up with friends home for the holiday and of course being with Matt. The air was filled with anticipation.

The ring was due to arrive on Tuesday so we knew from that day on it could happen. Thanksgiving Day came and went and the Grandparents were starting to discuss their return trip. Maybe they should leave sooner to avoid the holiday traffic. Of course Tom and I constantly plotted to persuade them to stay.

Saturday rolled around and Lindsay and I were preparing a picnic lunch for she and Matt. They had planned to spend the day together in St. Augustine, nothing unusual for them. I made sure there was a nice bottle of wine to go with the turkey sandwiches. She left with the scrumptious basket around 10AM to meet Matt.

Shortly after she left the house the phone rang.  It was Matt asking if we could have all the relatives from both sides of the family at our house at 3PM. Today was the day. I agreed and immediately called Publix Bakery for a congratulatory cake. The doorbell rang and it was the florist with a huge arrangement. The card read “To the future Mrs. Garrity, we love you so much! Can’t wait to be there to celebrate with you. love, Samantha and Audrey.” All arranged from San Francisco. Phone calls were made, family invited. Everyone was wondering what was happening.

Back to the lovebirds.

Matt and Lindsay were en route to St. Augustine. Just south of Ponte Vedra Matt  pulled off the road and told Lindsay he was giving her an early Christmas present. She would need to be blindfolded and he placed the black rolled napkin over her eyes and tied it behind her head. She was laughing while trying to guess what it could possibly be. Just a few months before they had gone to the Jacksonville Beach Air-show. Lindsay had remarked she would like to one day ride in a stunt plane. Little did she know, today was the day.

They arrived at the St. Augustine Regional Airport and Matt escorted Lindsay to the prearranged area where  pilot Craig Fordham and stunt plane “Yoda” stood waiting. Matt said, “Merry Christmas, you are going for a ride.” Lindsay was helped into her parachute and into the rear seat on the airplane by pilot and crew and before she could refuse they were taking off down the runway heading north toward Jacksonville Beach.

The airplane is a training plane equipped with cameras on each wing, the nose and the tail.  The pilot and passenger have sibilance headphones so they can communicate with one another and also the ground crew and air traffic control. Throughout the flight the pilot asked Lindsay how she was doing as he looped and spun his was along the sunny beaches of St. Augustine and Jacksonville all the while capturing her reaction on video.

Suddenly Matt was speaking to her in her headphones. ” Are you enjoying your wild ride?”  he asked. “Yes,” she said.  “This is crazy.”  ‘Would you like to take another wild ride with me?  Will you marry me?”  he asked. “What?” she said, screaming in delight. “Yes, oh yes.”  The pilot also came into her ear saying, “Would you like to go back now?” “Yes, please “,  she replied as the cameras rolled capturing her tears and surprise.

Back at the hangar the ground crew was preparing for Yoda’s landing and had a camera crew to capture what was about to happen. Matt went down on one knee as Yoda approached. Pilot Craig helped Lindsay out of the plane and she ran to Matt and the ring box extended to her.  He placed the platinum solitaire diamond on her left hand ring finger and they embraced in a romantic kiss.

After several pictures Matt and Lindsay left St. Augustine airport and went to the park to eat their lunch and share some private time. On the way they phoned the parents to tell them the good news. When Tom and I heard the phone ring we BOTH picked up the telephone.  “Mom, Dad, I am marrying Matt”  Lindsay screamed into the phone.  We told her we were very happy for them and we loved them both.

The Garrity and Zitiello family began to arrive  at our house as well as Matt & Lindsay’s friends and some of their parents. The bottles of champagne were on ice . When they finally arrived we all rushed to the front door to greet the happy couple with congratulations and many hugs and kisses.

After things calmed down Tom raised a glass of champagne and gave a wonderful toast to the future Mr. & Mrs. Matthew Christopher Garrity, followed by a toast from Jack Garrity, Jack Sherrod and Blake Sherrod. It was a beautiful day. I know the Grandparents will never forget being there to share every moment of it.

Matt had shown both his creativity and his romantic side  in a beautiful way.  And, one day, if God blesses them with children, they will be able to watch the engagement proposal of their parents right before their eyes!

We are certain Matt loves our daughter and she loves him. What more could a Mother and Father ask for their only daughter?

We love you too Matt Garrity!